DEFINING MOMENTS~ 'Messy Messy Girl'

Hi everyone, happy new year. I hope y'all are doing fabulous. Thank you to everyone who checked up on me during the holidays. I don't know anyone of you, but I'm grateful for having met you all on here. Life for me lately has been kinda ruff. Work, Work and more work. I can't believe I don't get the chance to visit my favorite blogs anymore, but God pass awon aye sha. I wanted to take a few lines to talk about some defining moments in my life. The moments that have shaped me into the woman I am today.

On Farting:
Story story(Do I hear a ... story) Once upon a time,...time time... there lived this girl called Nefertiti. See Nefertiti was painfully shy as a young'n. So one day, after eating vast amounts of kuli kuli and epa, a tornado began to brew in her stomach region. When she thought no one was looking, she let a silent bomb rip. Now we all know how evil primary school kids are. My seatmate, who also happened to be one of my Best friends then, (Let's call her U. Truly, her name starts with U, but for the life of me, I can't recall her name)was the loudest of the bunch. Whenever anyone farts, U is usually the High barrister yansh smeller. She singles someone out, and that person is the criminal as far as the whole school is concerned. Anyways, U noticed that this smell was 'conker' than the average, so she decides to investigate. At this point my heart is going 500 beats per minute and I am praying fervently that I won't be one of the few people whose bum will be smelled (Hey, she wasn't called the high chief for nothing.. eugh, I know)Inside, I'm dying. I feel almost physically sick. U begins to scream, saying she knows that it's one of three people of which I'm the least expected suspect. The two other kids swear it's not them, but as I usually don't say much, and so I have more 'supporters' than the other 2 kids do.

U then decides to smell every one's bum. When it's my turn, I refuse to get up from my seat. She continues taunting me, saying if I knew it wasn't me, then I should swear on the bible. Being the little punk that I am, I say it's against God's word. lol. I can even remember the exact words. "The bible says we should not call God's name in vain". I try to ignore U, but she grabs my pencil and starts throwing it around the class. I somehow forget that I am not getting up, and lunge for my pencil- Chaos! U begins to yell "HUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNMMMMMM"! at the top of her lungs and instantly composes the lyrics to a song. I remember that song of course, and no, I am not gonna sing it for you, AMEBO...lol Someone might know the song and put 2 and 2 together.

Anyway, U and her boyfriend connive to pin 'Messy Messy girl' to the back of my uniform. I didn't notice this till I got home. All I know was I didn't have any friends for the rest of the school year, no one talked to me on the school bus home, and I really hated U. I remember making paper dolls of her and sticking pins into it's butt, imagining with all my will power that I was causing U pain.

Because of this experience, I never fart in public. I will always excuse myself to go to the bathroom to fart, which some of my friends consider weird. I can never understand how some people feel free to just let it rip freely like that. This experience is just one of my defining moments in life. I will be posting some of my other defining moments at least once a month.

Once again, Happy New Year to you all. What are some of your defining moments?